The Christmass break starts for me today! [I've written this on saturday]

I haven't written anything for a while, I think I've been missing doing journals.

Finally, I can clean everything around without haste. Organize my sketches and finish them, streamline things in my room and throw out any useless objects before the new year. Hopefully some of my friends will go back to our city for the holidays so we can finally meet. I regret that it is hard to meet with people who happen to live in the other part of the country, but maybe providence will allow something.

Maybe I'm even going to play some vidya ( although I am lately very keen on trying not to waste time). Tho having a friendly hot seat multiplayer with friend in HoMM3 , 4 or 5 is almost a kind of tradition.



As for today, I woke up in a sentimental mood. My heart seems more sensitive today, so I was quite emotional ( it's both blissful and painful at the same time). I wonder to what degree the reason should have supremacy over our emotions. Maybe it's good to once in awhile let the emotions loose, but then, If you will not be cautious enough, it can ruin your serenity.

Then I saw this: [link] [it's an interactive comic] and thought that maybe if I put my feelings into art it can work great things.


I also had a dream today. Sometimes I have amazing dreams. I wake up feeling great happiness , and then I think hard trying to remember why I feel so happy. Dreams quickly fade away and what is left behind is just a bunch of images, so I can only get a very hazy idea of what was it that made me feel so exceptional. Today in my dream appeared a unique person I haven't seen for quite a long now. From what I remeber she hadn't said anything or reply to my questions, but was just looking at me. Now that I paid attention to it, I wonder if it has any symbolism.

Sometimes later in life I encounter places or see images that instantly remind me of a dream I had in the past, it's a kind of feeling like: 'I've been here before, I saw this!'. I don't think that dreams are totally random. I think that sometimes they might carry a message, or a hint suggesting what we should do or consider in life.

Then, I always had a thing for daydreaming. Writing ideal scripts in my mind. It's like trying to recreate a part of heaven inside your mind.

[link]

Not much in there yet, but still, I very like the idea.

Latley I've watched a few episodes of Tsubasa Chronicles which made me ponder about some things. It seems that the characters during the story are forced to sacrifice many things that are precious to them. At some point when they want their wish fulfilled they have to pay for it by giving up something that is most precious to them.

This instantly made me wonder what would be it in my case - what is the most dear thing to me and would I be able to live without it?
Its had to tell what I really treasure the most, although I can think of some things which are of great value to me. Let's say... my graphic skills. Although they are not of superior quality, I really appreciate the fact that I can draw and do things in Photoshop. If drawing disappeared from my life I would feel that a part of me have vanished.
What else... Probably my experience ( but somehow I cannot imagine becoming a blank sheet of paper again), so I'll say knowledge instead. All that immense knowledge of the world that makes me conscious of many things but also burdens me heavily. I would not want to have a blissful but ignorant existence. Also faith - it's closely related to the purpose our existesce, so along with knowledge it is crucial to our life.
In case of the material things I would mention my pc and tablet. Also books... and maybe my bike.
About people... Family and friends of course. If I'd have a partner, the realtionship with her would probably surpass the value of majority of other things.


In the end it appears that we are not so poor and we have some really valuable things.
Can you think of anything that is most precious to you ? Would it be a skill, a physical object, a person or maybe something else ?


Trivial as it may seem, the progress of the plot in Tsubasa reminded me of the fact that life is a constant sacrifice - we incessantly lose something in order to gain something else.
Fay loses one of his eyes which equals forfeiting half of his magical powers. Later on he gives up the other half of his powers by allowing to extract the blueness from his remaining eye. In the end many end up more tattered and weaker than at the beginning. However, inside they have gained something - perhaps they are now 'a sadder and wiser a men'.
Sometimes in order to go on, life requires a huge sacrifice. It makes me think about the things I had to give up throughout life, like hobbies,interests or material objects.

Ultimately, it seems that at some point we will have to relinquish everything in order to gain everything. After all, we cannot take anything from this world into the afterlife. Everything eventually fades away, only good deeds stay.

It sort of reminds me of the parable about the pearl:
Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man, seeking goodly pearls:
Who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it.

Musze przyznac ze obok czwartej edycji, Piernicon 5 byl chyba dla mnie najlepszym konwentem ever. Nie wiem czy to fajny klimat miejscowki i Torunia, czy ze wzgledu na atrakcje i ludzi, ot wszystko na raz pewnie.

Pierwsze co mnie rozwalilo to ogromna makieta z Koniem Rafalem hasającym na Pierniconie - epickie. Dziwnym trafem tuz przed wyjsciem na conplace pokazalem Szirajowi odcinki Konia Rafala w necie i tym samym nijako antycypowalem pozniejszy craze. Nawet Yanek biegal z atrapa konia na glowie i mowil: 'ja nic nie wiem , jestem tylko koniem'

Dziekuje wszystkim ktorzy wysiedzieli na moim panelu o fotomontazu w Photoshopie - nawet jakos to wyszlo, nie zgubilem watkow i przekazalem co mialem przekazac.

Cospley byl genialny - tylu wspanialych strojow nie widzialem dawno. Nie wiem czy to wrazliwosc na piekno, czy poprostu pojawiaja sie we mnie jakies pierwiastki cosplaytarda
Bardzo podobaly mi sie stroje grupy z Tsubasa Chronicles - swietna scenka - powinna zajac pierwsze miejsce
Byl nawet maly aspekt komiczny - gdy Rushi nie mogl uniesc Sakury - wszystko tylko na plus do ogolnego wrazenia :J

Panel o bishah - powiem szczerze, ze obawialem sie tam wejsc. Sala pelna fangrilow (jak juz nie bylo miejsca to w drzwiach staly) i pare jednostek plci meskiej ktore mozna policzyc na palcach jednej reki. Ale smiesznie bylo, tho chwilami troche bolesne dla uszu hehe.

Wzielismy nawet udzial w teh evil pkmn cosplay - nasz Magikarp byl najlepszy *splash*

Byly momenty kiedy sie nudzilem, albo zaspyialem na stole ze zmeczenia, no ale takie rzeczy sa zawsze.

Ending party dalo rade najbardziej - takiego disko nigdy nie widzialem ;D ( choc z zalozenia nie przepadam za takimi imprezami ) - czerstwe zarty i wyglupy orgow na scenie, tanie imitacje znanych (dla mojego pokolenia) hitow, stare kultowe piosenki pokroju Captain Jack, Backstreet Boys i pare nowszych vide Kanikuly - smialem sie do rozpuku - bezcenne wspomnienia.

Finally decided to do those.



COMISSION INFO:

[USD/ polish Zloty]


color CG

[fullbody] 20$ / 60zl
[waist-up] 15$ / 45zl
[bust] 10$ / 30zl

additional character: + 10$ / 30zl
background: + 5-10$ / 15-30zl

sketch (pencil or tablet)

[fullbody] 15$ / 45zl
[waist-up] 10$ / 30zl
[bust] 5$ / 15zl

additional character: + 5$ / 15zl
background: + 5$ / 15zl

lineart

[fullbody] 15$ / 45zl
[waist-up] 10$ / 30zl
[bust] 5$ / 15zl

additional character: + 5$ / 15zl
background: + 5$ / 15zl



how to order:

Sent me note or email (black.lord@interia.pl) entitled "DA Commission" with the following information:

your name:
commission type:
description (references recommended):
BG type:
your paypal account:

When I receive your order I’ll send you confirmation.



payment:

worldwide: Paypal only.

poland: akceptuje przelewy na konto w PLN


Paying order:

I’ll start drawing as soon as I receive at least half of the payment.



important notes:

Pictures are for your personal use only.

There are some things I may not draw, so there is a small chance that I'll decline your offer if the request will for instance prove to be beyond my skill, etc.